Eulogy for Mom
Pansy Geraldine Davis nee Green lived
not only a good life, but an exemplary one. As her children we were given
unconditional love, but she thought that was the kind of love everyone
deserved. She was all love in her actions, as a nurse, as a partner in life to
Dad, as a sibling, as a beloved friend to many, and as our mom.
She was patient but prompt. She
was kind but did not mince words when the truth was needed. She was not boastful, despite her
accomplishments, although she did say that she always knew “whodunnit” having
watched and read so many mystery stories. In later years she occasionally said
she was proud that she didn’t raise prejudice children. She never bragged about
getting straight A’s when she went back to school for her master's in nursing, or
about her consummate golf and quilt-making skills.
My mother was not someone who
talked much about her faith. Yet I know
of no other person who followed the teachings of Jesus more closely. That
unconditional love radiated her faith in her actions and how she treated
people.
A friend of mine once commented
that our family was sentimental about food. Well, we were about things Mom
made. I found a Mother’s Day card I made in fourth grade that said, “Thankyou
for making corn bread dressing,” which she made for every holiday meal, along
with beef and vegetable stew, red cake and of course the best possible
cornbread.
Mom loved deserts and made great
ones---from homemade peach ice cream to crem brulee, bananas foster and Tira
masu.
Mom thought any drink tasted
better with lime juice in it, and I inherited that taste. For decades she had a lime tree. She also
liked hummingbirds, slot machines, bright colors, making clothes and quilts and
reading.
My mother gave me access to
learning by answering questions I asked before I could read. The first time I
heard a live orchestra, I was about 5, and they were playing Mozart’s “Jupiter
Symphony.” I asked Mom what Jupiter was, and instead of just saying “it’s a big
planet,” she told me about the Greek and Roman gods the planets were named
after. She read a picture book of the Iliad and Odyssey to me, and I memorized
the Greek alphabet in the back. Ancient Greek became my main language in
college, and with it I read not only Homer, but the New Testament, and Greek
drama, which was to be my specialty when I became professor of theatre history.
theatre history.
She also read a whole King
Arthur book to me and I still read Arthurian scholarship today, NOT fan
fiction. For her 80th birthday, I drew a picture once of my mom
reading that King Arthur book to me in her white nurse’s uniform, her white
shoes sticking out from beyond the edge of the book. So, she read our bedtime
stories right before she went to work. And remember those complex origami looking
hats? Very hard to draw. What the
picture represented was how she worked nights when we were little, and slept
while we were at school. We never felt her absence. I still wonder at how she
did that. I ended up becoming a Drama major and got my PHD at the UW School of
Drama in Seattle.
Mother also helped me with my
interest in theatre. She made costumes and puppets for the little shows I put
on. My parents sent me to Saturday Drama classes at the civic theatre for
almost all my school years. Both our parents are lifelong learners, and helped
us learn about whatever we were interested in. For me it was playing music and
writing. Mom would never interrupt me when she saw that I was practicing or
writing or drawing in earnest.
We all benefitted from her sense
of humor. One holiday dinner my brother was talking about how music to me was
like fishing to him. You must understand this was a compliment since Barry is a
fishing genius. He added, “But I understand music.” Which is very true, he
does, I then said, “I understand fishing.” Mom was the only one who laughed.
I also inherited a couple of Mom’s
quirks---the ability to get turned around and when coming out of a building,
always choosing the wrong direction. I inherited ger tendency toward spoonerisms.
She laughed at herself when she once said, “Calvin Clean Jines.” I was in a
childrten’s play and once said, “Fiestas, Pound Ups, Row Wows long ago.”
She was a world traveler and loved new places and new
ideas.
I look out today and I see many people who knew my mother
as Pansy, a sort of different person than our mom, because she was much more
than our mom. She was a boss, a hand at Bridge, a golf partner, a healer, quietly
intellectual and a quick study.
She lived a
good life and she lived an exemplary life. Pansy, our mother, was all Love, and
loved by everyone who knew her.
